Maths WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!!

   My major problem is maths.I just dont know why i dont seem to understand it at all like to the max! My friend S is smart at it.Complain only but still could do. Today teacher gave back our paper (the first test for semester 2) -__________- i know i did not understand! i prayed hard to god but of course i know God Almighty did not help me. Is it me or why is God not helping me these days!!!! :'( i feel like crying. I feel so humiliated its like i am the lowest in my class for ausmat maths. Okay perhaps not lowest but weaaaker students in maths. I dont really blame Miss.S despite hating her teaching -.- but i feel that i just dont get the concept but actually we had done it before :( i feel so stupid. Can u imagine what would have happen if i fail maths and chem??? Thats it! my future dreams,hope and lot of stuff will be down the drain. I will bring disgrace to the family. I really regret it. So far my dad is thinking that i am okay in my studies and the spm marks was a mistake! Am i experiencing a bad 7 years? i feel dumb!!!!!!!!

  The guys in my maths class doesnt seem to show interest in me probably coz i am dumb! S is like smart and intelligent and loves chemistry. Before this i used to think that we have lots of stuff in common! but actually an absolute NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 Test 4 is next week.Worst scenario it involves probabilty!!!!! distribution...1 thing is Miss S decided to reduce the weightage as she found that most of us did badly for the test -________- @_@
 so out of 5% i got 1.25% :((((((((((((((

       i seriously had no mood today! i went to pyramid ate Nandos with S and avoid this guy by the name of K cause he has a serious crush on S and S finds him annoying!!! S is really perfect everything in her hand...her boyfriend,whole guys going after her like the whole gang in maths class..1 of them are hot, excelling in studies ,loves chem, absolutely could enter doctor any uni ..whereas i feel so dumb!!!!!!!!!!! maybe i am jealous..but she is really a nice person!